‘Actions speak louder than words’ is a well known saying, and for the most part,
true. However, I've come to realize that discernment is still necessary.
People can smile in your face, yet can vilify you behind your back. People might
help you only to feel good about themselves, while still being judgmental. This is
why it's so important to ask the Lord to search our hearts in order to reveal any
wickedness, lest we do this to others.
The Lord loves answering those prayers. It's the human condition to want to feel
good about ourselves, but it's the sin nature to judge and compare ourselves.
Here's the thing though. We are all on a sea of glass, and no one is better than
another. Yes, there are people I would rather not associate with, and wouldn't
shed a tear if they never came to know God, but that's the sin nature in me, not
God's heart. I guess that's what being "normal" is, but children of God are called
to more, to much more.
In this life, all we can hope for is that God purifies our hearts so we stand before
Him sanctified. Humans will always accuse and hurl attacks towards others, and
many times it will be towards people we care for very much. We must forgive
them for their accusations and not hold it against them, or else we participate in
sin ourselves and step out of the divine transformation of our hearts that we've
been called to.
Some of us are pretty strange birds, and that's part of the beauty of life. There's
a whole internet world of cookie cutter families posting their lives in hopes of
gaining followers who want to mimic every move. There is nothing wrong with
taking things we respect or admire, and making them part of ourselves. I just
hope we are allowing the Lord to have His input on those characteristics.
The painful lesson I'm learning this season is to embrace who I am, and to not
hold it against those that don't want to understand or embrace me. Being
someone who tries to understand everything about everyone, is challenging for
me. I want to relate with people who do not care to delve deeper into my life or to
have compassion and understand me. But, I've come to accept that's probably
how they're wired, and I'm just as confusing to them.
We all have issues. There's no way around accepting that. For example, as
much as I'm trying to not be addicted to my phone, I found a social media reel
that helped me to better understand rejection, while the Lord was working a deep
transformation in my heart.
The reel was a mama and her son. She held various items in her hand and
asked her son to pick one. He did, and she immediately asked what was wrong
with the other items, and he responded "Nothing." That's applicable to us as
well. Just because we weren't picked doesn't mean there's anything wrong with
us, we just weren't chosen.
If I go to buy myself flowers, and I leave with a stargazer lily, it doesn't mean I
also don't love the rose, or the tulips, the carnations, or even the baby's breath. It
just means the stargazer lily is what spoke to my heart that day. I want to apply
that to my everyday interactions. We like to think if someone or something isn't
chosen, that something else was actually better, when that's not always the
case. And quite possibly, rarely the case.
I am grateful that the Lord has allowed this last season of personal rejection
because it's helped me to come to terms with the truth that His love is enough.
I've always said it, but I've never walked it. And if we're going to be brutally
honest, I'm still not walking in it.
We all have a wall we use to protect ourselves from pain, despite pain being
necessary for character development. We can't protect ourselves from others,
and also grow to the stature that the Lord desires. He will protect us, He will lead
us, He will love us, and He will heal us.
We protect ourselves by immersing our hearts in Him, and then listening to His
still and quiet voice, no matter what our flesh desires or our mind says.
God is all about exposing, but He exposes for purpose and redemption. All
hidden things will become known and that's a good thing for those that want to
know Him. The less the enemy can hold over us, the less ability he has to make
us into his personal marionettes.
It's not hard to manipulate people, but it's ugly as heck to do so. Release the
need to control, and put it in God's hands, for He makes all things new in His
timing. We want clean hands and a pure heart to pursue the MORE of Him, and
this is the season He wants to pour it out.
We need not be concerned that the darkness keeps spreading, for His kingdom
and its light are doing the same. Change your focus. God's love is our priority,
we must feed upon it, for it's only in doing so that we can know who we are, and
what He's called us to.
If not, we become like worker bees, and yes we're doing what we should, but it's
almost robotic and we were called to so much more.
I'm not sure if this will even make sense to most, but it marks a very important
stage in my life, and ultimately that's what this blog is for. I had thought I was
helping others, when in reality, I was keeping a journal that would help me. We
only know what we know, and we all know it partly. The body of Christ is coming
into its fullness, and I'm grateful that I'm allowed to be a part of that, even in my
struggle to understand all things. Be blessed and be a blessing <3
