My days used to contain an innumerable amount of little white lies which never at all bothered me in the least. I found them to be necessary and a part of life. After all, what does it hurt to increase a friend's self-esteem by telling them they look great when mediocre would be a more appropriate word, or telling someone that I had already committed to doing X because I didn't want to go to Y with them, or even trying to comfort someone by telling them they did all they could if I know that's not the truth of the matter. That was my thought process, keep the peace, make other people feel better, don't hurt others feelings, and go on my merry lil' way.
While for the most part I still have that same thought process, how I had previously implemented that is no longer an acceptable means of communication for me. What started as a sense of knowing I wasn't being 100% truthful has developed into an unrest in my spirit that doesn't fade until I make it right. Thankfully the Lord allows me to just repent to Him for fudging the truth a bit (AKA lying) and not necessarily having to go to the person. Although, truth be told, there are those times also.
I Thessalonians 5:23-24 says "Now may the God of peace Himself sanctify you completely; and may your whole spirit, soul, and body be preserved blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. He who calls you is faithful, who also will do it." I know that it's the work of the Spirit of God in my life that is bringing me this conviction. He is working this in my heart and calling me to a higher standard of living than I currently walk in. I welcome and thank Him for this, b/c I desire to see His truth reign in my life.
What's absolutely wonderful is that this revelation of my heart and my character is not me searching myself and finding what I need to be better at, but it's God lovingly showing me what He sees that He'd like to expose for what it is. The more I seek Him, the more I experience His love for me. He is my Father, He desires to train me in the way I should go. As humans, we like to rationalize our behavior and compare ourselves to others to help build us up, and that is NOT the will of God in our lives. The only person we should ever compare ourselves to is Jesus, b/c His sinless walk is what we're called to emulate. Granted, we will never be perfect, but in our love for Him we are called to walk in the truth of it according to the grace of God on our lives. His grace is always sufficient. Ask God if there's anything you're doing that is hurting Him and what He's trying to do in your life? Simple question, and I promise you there's a simple answer, yes there is something, and He loves you so much that He's going to show you if you want Him to.